To my eldest baby......

HAPPY BIRTHDAY

NICK

I remember the day you were born like yesterday. I couldn't believe how beautiful you were. A shock of dark hair, the brightest blue eyes and perfect little body - amazing, all 9lb 5oz of you! Here you are now - taller, more handsome, funny, and still with the brightest blue eyes - my beautiful boy.

May your birthday be the best

with many more to come.

Love you

MUM & DAD

xxxx

Honours and Batteries........

Mimi (Mimi Writes), the Queen of the Peace Globe Movement has bestowed the following award on me.




Not only that, she had these very kind words to say


Her Friday Flash Fiction is truly excellent. Witty. Smart. Entertaining. Check it out! She's the Hawaiian girl from Lancashire, United Kingdom. I appreciate her faithful comments. HUGS to you my friend.


Now these words mean a lot to me especially coming from someone like Mimi, a mistress of penmanship.


Thank you Mimi I am truly honoured.


Mimi didn't give any rules about passing the award on so I will just pass it on to one person as Mimi did.


The award goes to someone I have only recently discovered. A man who's post titles and witty footnotes, like this:


Gee, The Navy Puts Up With A Lot Of Ship


A $600 million Royal Navy aircraft carrier had to turn back two days into a mission - after its fridge broke down. HMS Illustrious, complete with hi-tech weaponry, was heading for the Indian Ocean with nearly 1,000 crew on board when it returned to port yesterday. A fault was located in the giant fridge so the captain set course for Portsmouth, where refrigeration experts were waiting to start the $20,000 repair.


FOOTNOTE: Like a fridge over troubled waters.

have me in stitches!

Then there's his photographs - go check them out they're amazing.

So David (Authorblog) please collect your award your blog is truly EXCELLENT!

David also has a Weekend Wandering question every week, which is an absolute godsend if you can't think of anything to blog about, and gets you thinking! This weeks question is below, with my answer. If you want to take part just go here to read what you have to do.


This week's question:

How efficiently (or inefficiently) would your household function without batteries?

I don't think we'd cope at all!

Change channels on the telly,
Start the DVD,
Turn the music up and set the video to play.
How to do all this? – you know that they’re a must!
The remotes aren’t working ‘cause the batteries have gone bust.

The cordless phones aren’t working,
You forgot to charge them up.
The Xbox racing game’s no good
Battery operated hand-control’s suddently gone kaput..

What time is it? The clocks are wrong,
And the calculator’s dead.
My cell phone’s worse than useless.
“Put new batteries in” I said.

I want some information
I’ll google it right now.
“Where’s the A4 batteries Spike?”
The mouse has gone on strike.

The lights are off,
A power cut.
The torch is in the cupboard.
Drat the thing’s not working
“Where’s the battery hoard?”

Who said we don’t need batteries?
They’re the most essential item.
In this modern world,
Just try and do without ‘em!

My Point Exactly.......

An 86-year-old man went to his doctor for his quarterly check-up...
The doctor asked him how he was feeling, and the 86-year-old said ,'Things are great and I've never felt better.'I now have a 20 year-old bride who is pregnant with my child. 'So what do you think about that Doc ?'



The doctor considered his question for a minute and then began to tell a story.


I have an older friend , much like you, who is an avid hunter and never misses a season. One day he was setting off to go hunting. In a bit of a hurry, he accidentally picked up his walking cane instead of his gun. As he neared a lake , he came across a very large male beaver sitting at the water's edge.


He realized he'd left his gun at home and so he couldn't shoot the magnificent creature. Out of habit he raised his cane , aimed it at the animal as if it were his favourite hunting rifle and went 'bang, bang'. Miraculously , two shots rang out and the beaver fell over dead.


Now, what do you think of that ? asked the doctor.


The 86-year-old said , Logic would strongly suggest that somebody else pumped a couple of rounds into that beaver.


The doctor replied , My point exactly.

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Misty (My Dogs Keep Me Sane) said I cheer her up and to prove it she gave me this

Thanks Misty, I'm happy you're happy. x

But wait there's more. Ron at Vent gave me the same award too! He said

"every time I visit your blog, I smile at the JOY that comes from you, in your wit and passion at which you blog. Thank you!"

Thank you Ron you're a pal. Head over to Ron's place if you want cheering up - he's the best.

And there's more..........

I got another one of these from CG (The Compulsive Worrier)

You make my day CG! - you should check out her photos!

Now you know I love you all, and you all cheer me up and make my day everytime you comment here so, as there doesn't seem to be a rule about how many people I can pass them on to (not that I abide by all the rules anyway), I'd like everyone who comments on this post to take the awards for themselves for cheering me up. It's up to you whether or not you pass them on.

Friday 55 Flash Fiction # 11 Government Initiative

Government Initiative

To conform to the Government’s new initiative, the school curriculum now boasts

Cookery lessons for all students.

It’s essential the students know how to feed themselves.

Basic recipes for good wholesome food will be taught.

Lesson:
1) How To Open A Packet.
2) Safety and How To Use A Microwave Oven.
3) Advanced Toast Preparation.

Friday 55 Flash Fiction is brought to you by susiestheboss.

Blue or Black?......

David's (Authorblog) question this week is:

Do you wear denim?

If you'd like to join in here's what David would like you to do:

Please answer today's question on your own blog, any time until next weekend. Just link to this blog (or to this post) so I can follow the progress of the discussion.

Of course I wear denim, doesn’t everybody? Blue, Black, Brown I don't care!

I work in an office and have to wear ‘smart’ clothes for work so the first thing I do when I get home is change into my denim jeans. I have lots of jeans, unfortunately most of them don’t fit, but they will soon once I have lost all the weight I’ve put on whilst recovering from my knee op. I have black, dark blue, stonewash jeans, I even have some sparkly ones. I have a jeans jacket too which I love. My favourite pair of jeans are a Versace pair, they were expensive and I haven’t been able to wear them for a ‘very’ long time, but once I reach my goal weight they’ll be coming out of storage.


Apparently in 1853, the California gold rush was in full swing, and everyday items were in short supply. Levi Strauss, a 24-year-old German immigrant, left New York for San Francisco with a small supply of dry goods with the intention of opening a branch of his brother's New York dry goods business. Shortly after his arrival, a prospector wanted to know what Mr. Strauss was selling. When Strauss told him he had rough canvas to use for tents and wagon covers, the prospector said, "You should have brought pants!," saying he couldn’t find a pair of pants strong enough to last. Levi Strauss had the canvas made into waist overalls. Miners liked the pants, but complained that they tended to chafe. Levi Strauss substituted a twilled cotton cloth from France called "serge de Nimes." The fabric later became known as denim and the pants were nicknamed blue jeans. Of course lots of jeans now have lycra in them – what a great invention that was!

I didn’t wear jeans until I was a teenager (70’s) when Bell Bottoms were in fashion. We used to cut the side seams and insert pieces of denim taken from an old pair of jeans to make the bell even wider and of course patches were acceptable too – anything to prolong the life of a favourite pair of jeans and customise them.


Whilst I love my jeans I don’t ‘live’ in them. I wear them round the house and to go shopping in, but I love to get dressed up when MWM and I go out to eat or meet up with friends, jeans, however dressed up, just don’t cut it with me for an evening out. Still I say God Bless Levi Strauss.

Politically Daft Correct.......

I received this in an email recently. It's supposed to be a joke but I thought I've got to get opinions on whether folk think this is how it is - so what do you think? Certainly British Police are so PC now that it is probably correct!

Question:
How do you tell the difference between a British Police Officer, Australian Police Officer, and an American Police Officer?


Pose the following question:
You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife, and charges. You are carrying a Glock 40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.
What do you do?



BRITISH POLICE OFFICER
Answer: (Immediate thought processes)
Is the knife a ceremonial kirpan?
Does he prefer to communicate in English or Bengali?
Will this negatively impact my chances of promotion?
Is this just his way of telling me that he pays my wages, and wants my job?
Would this be an appropriate time to hug him and sing Koombaya?
Will the media do a profile of him and how he was loved by everyone including his dog?
Is the alleged "client" a member of an Environmental Group?
Is he just a squeegee kid / pan handler trying to make a living on the mean streets?
Is he a member of a gang that is just "misunderstood" by society?
Is he a recent illegal immigrant to this country, and just doesn't know how to approach the police?
Is he recently released on parole and hasn't been properly integrated back into the community?
Is he a victim of fetal alcohol syndrome and just doesn't understand what he is doing?
Is he a member of a visible minority group?
Warn and Charter him as he approaches.



AUSTRALIAN OFFICER
Answer: BANG!



AMERICAN OFFICER
Answer: BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!

*************************************

Linda (Are We There Yet?) tagged me for a little linky love. A little love is always welcome and you get to find some great new blogs.

Start copying here
This link loving in 2008 came from Simone's Butterfly:
I have randomly selected 5 of you below to be tagged and I hope that you will similarly publish this post in your blog. You will have to tag 5 other bloggers and just keep adding on to the list. (Do not replace, just keep on adding! Yes we hope it will be a long list!)It’s real easy! Tag others and see your Technorati Authority increase exponentially!The benefits of Viral Linking: - One of the fastest ways to see your technorati authority explode! - Increase your Google PageRank fast - Attract large volume of new traffic to your site - Build your community - Make new friends!

Add your blog url here...The Strategist Notebook /Link Addiction/ Ardour of the Heart /When Life Becomes a Book /The Malaysian Life/ Yogatta.com/ What goes under the sun /Roshidan’s Cyber Station /Sasha says /Arts of Physics/ And the legend lives/ My View, My Life /A Simple Life /What Women REALLY Think /Not Much More Than This /Jayedee /Jenn /Beth/ Christie/ Marla /Cailin /Simone /FlipFlopMom Katrina /Gill's Jottings /Work of the Poet/ Wakela/Modern Day Goddess/Livin With MeAre /We There Yet?? /Everything And Nothing/You are next...

Finish copying here

I love all of your so rather than choose I will just tag the first five people who commented on my last post, so here they are:

Little Wing
Ciara
Lettuce
Elween
Flowerpot

Friday 55 Flash Fiction #10 Winning Numbers

Winning Numbers

"Have you got the lottery numbers for me?" demanded Jack

"Perhaps it's a bad line and they can't hear you" said Jill

"Can you hear me?"

A waste of time, thought Jack, it had been Jill's idea.

8 14


Jill smiled


23 38

as the

24


glass slid across the table

49

selecting the numbers.

Friday 55 Flash Fiction is brought to you by susiestheboss.

mY rOcK bAnD..........

Mimi Queen of Memes tagged me for

The Band Meme

She threatened to throw anyone who doesn't do it in the dungeon (oooer missus), but that's not why I've had a go - it sounded like fun.

Here's how it goes. You are about to have your own band's CD cover. Follow these directions to the letter. It's fun and requires no thought at all. Go to......

1. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:Random

The first article title on the page is the name of your band.

2. http://www.quotationspage.com/random.php3

The last four words of the very last quote is the title of your album.

3. http://www.flickr.com/explore/interesting/7days/

The third picture, no matter what it is, will be your album cover.

4. Use your graphics program of choice to throw them together, and post the result as a comment in this post. Also, pass it along in your own journal because it’s more amusing that way.

My band's name is Kingdom Coaster and the album title is Nothing But A Winner

And here's my band's first album cover

It's great fun and I'm sure you'll want to have a go so I'm not going to tag anyone (Mimi tagged just about everyone in the blogosphere) - just go and make your first album!

If you want to see others album covers see the following:

Band memers: Bud - The Band Meme WTIT Style, Linda at Are We There Yet?, Sandee at Comedy Plus , Bands That Rock - EDog's Everything Page , Bond's Big Leather Couch , Crazy Working Mom , Coffee2Go , Hammer , Julie's Jewels and Junque , Lyn's Last Minute Life , Speedcat Hollydale Page, Knit For Joy , Gill's Jottings, Lee at Tarheel Ramblings, Jamie from Duward Discusssions, Maggie Moo Talks2U, My View Of It, Colin at Life, Work of the Poet, Mauigirl's Meanderings, Lori from Hahn At Home, The Painted Veil, Dixie's Heart and Soul, Anndi's Luggage, Monday Morning Power, Peanut, Peanut Butter Jelly2! , Asara's Mental Meanderings, Mr. Lance Solitary Views, Diary of a Heretic, Kids, Cats, & Books - Nola Dawn, Observations From the Back 40, Late Bloomer Boomer , My Dogs Keep Me Sane - Misty Dawn, Random Autumness, Akelamalu at Everything and Nothing, Mimi at Mimi Writes.

Are your manners better than this chimp's?.....

Brighton College has introduced a compulsory etiquette course for its pupils covering such topics as when to remove one's jacket at dinner, which fork to use when and how to waltz.

But how's your grasp of modern manners?

They have done an online test here , have a go, it's interesting, and let me know how you scored.

Here's the first question

1.Which is the most polite way to drink a cappuccino? Should you skim the froth off with a spoon, or avoid completely the use of the spoon?

a)Drink through the froth

b)Use the spoon

Thankfully my score entitles me to use a knife and fork and didn't restrict me to a finger buffet, so I do have some manners.

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Dumdad (The Other Side Of Paris) has passed this award on to me

Isn't that kind? Thanks Dumdad.

I have been instructed to: “Give the award to up to 10 people whose blogs bring you happiness and inspiration and make you feel so happy about being part of the blogging community! Let them know by posting a comment on their blog so that they can pass it on.”

As every single blogger who reads my drivel and comments here 'MAKES MY DAY' I can't choose between you, so the first ten people who comment please take the award with my thanks for keep coming back.

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As you know my New Year's Resolution was to lose weight and get fit. You may/may not have noticed the new button I've added to my sidebar, just below my profile - this is where I will be tracking my weight loss - if anyone is interested.

Friday 55 Flash Fiction #9 Moonlight

Moonlight

She could hardly believe her luck that her blind date was so handsome.

He took her in his arms, she felt his hot breath as he moved closer, breathing hard.

As the moon appeared from behind the cloud.

He raised his head and howled at it, just before snapping his jaws shut on her neck.

Friday 55 Flash Fiction is brought to you by susiestheboss but is hosted again this week by g-man.

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Bella (the mad) Household of La Bellina Mammina was awarded this by Melanie who created it.

Melanie said

I created my very own blogging award to pass on. Okay fine- I have no idea how to create my very own blogging award button, so Rich did it for me.Now it’s really more of a club than an award- and you all know that you belong in this club.

So, here are my rules: Please grab the button and proudly display it on your blog. Pass it on to as many people as you want to. Feel free to give Livin’ With Me a little linky love.

So, if you think you're a member of this club grab the badge and pass it on.

PS Melanie is starting a blogroll for all those who grab the badge so pop over and let her know if you'd like to join.

Flavour of the Month meme....

Travis (Trav's Thoughts) posted this recently and rather than tag anyone said you could have a go if you felt like it, then Jo Beaufoix tagged me for it, so here goes.


1. Mention the person who tagged you and create a link back to them.
2. Copy-paste the traits for all the twelve months (see below).
3. Pick your month of birth (see below).
4. Highlight the traits that apply to you.
5. Tag 12 people and let them know by visiting their blogs and leaving a comment for them.
6. Let the person who tagged you know when you’ve done it!


Get yourself a cup of tea/coffee this could take some time.....


I was born in November.

Has a lot of ideas: I do but I don't always act on them. Some are good, some are bad and some are just plain daft!

Difficult to fathom: I think this may be true because MWM keeps saying he'll never understand me completely even after 35 years together.

Thinks forward: Definitely but sometimes that can be hazardous because I imagine all the things that can go wrong so it gets me in a tizzy.

Unique and brilliant: Well I don't want to blow my own trumpet but.....

Extraordinary ideas: Probably MWM often says "only you could think of something like that!"

Sharp thinking: Definitely except on a Sunday when I usually have a hangover!

Fine and strong clairvoyance: Oh yes, I can read minds!

Can become good doctors: I've not had any medical training but I can usually give a good diagnosis, probably because of all the reading I've done looking up symptoms!

Dynamic in personality: Mmmm depends how tired I am.

Secretive: Not at all, I'll tell anyone who cares to listen my life story.

Inquisitive: Too much so, if I was a cat I'd have been dead by now from curiosity.

Knows how to dig secrets: I've never had to dig for secrets, people automatically tell me theirs. Email me now!

Always thinking: I find it very difficult to let my mind go blank................................ where was I?

Less talkative but amiable: I'd rather listen than talk for sure.

Brave and generous. Patient: I like to think I'm all of those but you'd have to ask my family and friends. Did I tell you I'm modest? ((wink))

Stubborn and hard-hearted: Stubborn I can definitely be but hard-hearted no certainly not, I'm as soft as butter.

If there is a will, there is a way: Determined :Never give up: Definitely all three apply to me.

Hardly becomes angry unless provoked: It takes a lot to rile me, the only exception is anything to do with children being hurt. I make a better friend than enemy though.

Loves to be alone: Totally wrong! I hate being alone. If I'm alone in the house I have to have the radio/television on in every room for company.

Thinks differently from others: I don't think so, though I sometimes expect others to think the say way as me.

Sharp-minded: Depends on how much I've had to drink!

Motivates oneself: Usually, except when it comes to exercise.

Does not appreciate praises: Totally wrong I definitely do appreciate praises.

High-spirited: Can be - see Sharp-minded.

Well-built and tough: I don't want to discuss my weight thank you very much!

Deep love and emotions: Romantic: Oh definitely.

Uncertain in relationships: I used to be until I found MWM.

Homely:I love my home.

Hardworking: I think so, and I'm sure my boss would agree if she didn't hate me and I her!

High abilities: I'm good at what I do - does that count?

Trustworthy: Totally.

Honest and keeps secrets: Your secret's safe with me, honest!

Not able to control emotions: I can cry at the drop of a hat.

Unpredictable: I don't think so.

Well that was quite fun to do but I'm not going to tag anyone. Feel free to have a go if you like and let me know if you do so I can read your answers please, cos I'm nosey!

JANUARY: Stubborn and hard-hearted. Ambitious and serious. Loves to teach and be taught. Always looking at people’s flaws and weaknesses. Likes to criticize. Hardworking and productive. Smart, neat and organized. Sensitive and has deep thoughts. Knows how to make others happy. Quiet unless excited or tensed. Rather reserved. Highly attentive. Resistant to illnesses but prone to colds. Romantic but has difficulties expressing love. Loves children. Loyal. Has great social abilities yet easily jealous. Very stubborn and money cautious.



FEBRUARY: Abstract thoughts. Loves reality and abstract. Intelligent and clever. Changing personality. Attractive. Sexy. Temperamental. Quiet, shy and humble. Honest and loyal. Determined to reach goals. Loves freedom. Rebellious when restricted. Loves aggressiveness. Too sensitive and easily hurt. Gets angry really easily but does not show it. Dislikes unnecessary things. Loves making friends but rarely shows it. Daring and stubborn. Ambitious. Realizes dreams and hopes. Sharp. Loves entertainment and leisure. Romantic on the inside not outside. Superstitious and ludicrous. Spendthrift. Tries to learn to show emotions.



MARCH: Attractive personality. Sexy. Affectionate. Shy and reserved. Secretive. Naturally honest, generous and sympathetic. Loves peace and serenity. Sensitive to others. Loves to serve others. Easily angered. Trustworthy. Appreciative and returns kindness. Observant and assesses others. Revengeful. Loves to dream and fantasize. Loves traveling. Loves attention. Hasty decisions in choosing partners. Loves home decors. Musically talented. Loves special things. Moody.



APRIL: Active and dynamic. Decisive and hasty but tends to regret. Attractive and affectionate to oneself. Strong mentality. Loves attention. Diplomatic. Consoling, friendly and solves people’s problems. Brave and fearless. Adventurous. Loving and caring. Suave and generous. Emotional. Aggressive. Hasty. Good memory. Moving. Motivates oneself and others. Sickness usually of the head and chest. Sexy in a way that only their lover can see.



MAY: Stubborn and hard-hearted. Strong-willed and highly motivated. Sharp thoughts. Easily angered. Attracts others and loves attention. Deep feelings. Beautiful physically and mentally. Firm Standpoint. Needs no motivation. Easily consoled. Systematic (left brain). Loves to dream. Strong clairvoyance. Understanding. Sickness usually in the ear and neck. Good imagination. Good physical. Weak breathing. Loves literature and the arts. Loves traveling. Dislike being at home. Restless. Not having many children. Hardworking. High spirited. Spendthrift.



JUNE: Thinks far with vision. Easily influenced by kindness. Polite and soft-spoken. Having ideas. Sensitive. Active mind. Hesitating, tends to delay. Choosy and always wants the best. Temperamental. Funny and humorous. Loves to joke. Good debating skills. Talkative. Daydreamer. Friendly. Knows how to make friends. Able to show character. Easily hurt. Prone to getting colds. Loves to dress up. Easily bored. Fussy. Seldom shows emotions. Takes time to recover when hurt. Brand conscious. Executive. Stubborn.



JULY: Fun to be with. Secretive. Difficult to fathom and to be understood. Quiet unless excited or tensed. Takes pride in oneself. Has reputation. Easily consoled. Honest. Concerned about people’s feelings. Tactful. Friendly. Approachable. Emotional temperamental and unpredictable. Moody and easily hurt. Witty and sparkly. Not revengeful. Forgiving but never forgets. Dislikes nonsensical and unnecessary things. Guides others physically and mentally. Sensitive and forms impressions carefully. Caring and loving. Treats others equally. Strong sense of sympathy. Wary and sharp. Judges people through observations. Hardworking. No difficulties in studying. Loves to be alone. Always broods about the past and the old friends. Likes to be quiet. Homely person. Waits for friends. Never looks for friends. Not aggressive unless provoked. Prone to having stomach and dieting problems. Loves to be loved. Easily hurt but takes long to recover.



AUGUST: Loves to joke. Attractive. Suave and caring. Brave and fearless. Firm and has leadership qualities. Knows how to console others. Too generous and egoistic. Takes high pride in oneself. Thirsty for praises. Extraordinary spirit. Easily angered. Angry when provoked. Easily jealous. Observant. Careful and cautious. Thinks quickly. Independent thoughts. Loves to lead and to be led. Loves to dream. Talented in the arts, music and defense. Sensitive but not petty. Poor resistance against illnesses. Learns to relax. Hasty and trusty. Romantic. Loving and caring. Loves to make friends.




SEPTEMBER: Suave and compromising. Careful, cautious and organized. Likes to point out people’s mistakes. Likes to criticize. Stubborn. Quiet but able to talk well. Calm and cool. Kind and sympathetic. Concerned and detailed. Loyal but not always honest. Does work well. Very confident. Sensitive. Good memory. Clever and knowledgeable. Loves to look for information. Must control oneself when criticizing. Able to motivate oneself. Understanding. Fun to be around. Secretive. Loves leisure and traveling. Hardly shows emotions. Tends to bottle up feelings. Very choosy, especially in relationships. Systematic.



OCTOBER: Loves to chat. Loves those who loves them. Loves to take things at the center. Inner and physical beauty. Lies but doesn’t pretend. Gets angry often. Treats friends importantly. Always making friends. Easily hurt but recovers easily. Daydreamer. Opinionated. Does not care of what others think. Emotional. Decisive. Strong clairvoyance. Loves to travel, the arts and literature. Touchy and easily jealous. Concerned. Loves outdoors. Just and fair. Spendthrift. Easily influenced. Easily loses confidence. Loves children.



NOVEMBER: Has a lot of ideas. Difficult to fathom. Thinks forward. Unique and brilliant. Extraordinary ideas. Sharp thinking. Fine and strong clairvoyance. Can become good doctors. Dynamic in personality. Secretive. Inquisitive. Knows how to dig secrets. Always thinking. Less talkative but amiable. Brave and generous. Patient. Stubborn and hard-hearted. If there is a will, there is a way. Determined. Never give up. Hardly becomes angry unless provoked. Loves to be alone. Thinks differently from others. Sharp-minded. Motivates oneself. Does not appreciate praises. High-spirited. Well-built and tough. Deep love and emotions. Romantic. Uncertain in relationships. Homely. Hardworking. High abilities. Trustworthy. Honest and keeps secrets. Not able to control emotions. Unpredictable.


DECEMBER: Loyal and generous. Sexy. Patriotic. Active in games and interactions. Impatient and hasty. Ambitious. Influential in organizations. Fun to be with. Loves to socialize. Loves praises. Loves attention. Loves to be loved. Honest and trustworthy. Not pretending. Short tempered. Changing personality. Not egotistic. Take high pride in oneself. Hates restrictions. Loves to joke. Good sense of humor. Logical.

Wayne and the Turkish Beauty....

We were holidaying in a lovely part of Turkey called Calis Beach (near Fethiye) in a lovely beachside hotel called Mutlu. I am one of those who likes to 'people watch' on holiday, I not only watch them but I give them nicknames and make up stories about them too. Anyway there were lots of nicknames and stories flying about in my head but one particular couple with an adorable boy of about 8 really got my imagination going.

She was a real beauty, black hair, dark sunkissed skin, fabulous turquoise eyes, he was a typical Brit pale skin, daft straw hat and a tattoo on his arm, the boy was adorable as I said. I lay in the sun watching her spitroast herself looking elegant and poised, tanning every inch of her body whilst I sweated and complained it was too hot. He was in and out of the water with the boy, they were having a great time. I pointed them out to MWM telling him the story I'd weaved about them. She was definitely Turkish and met Wayne about 9 years before whilst he was there on holiday. Obviously he must have some charm to make a catch like her I deduced, they'd got married, gone back to his home in England, had the adorable one and were back visiting her family and holidaying at the same time.

"Yes dear if you say so" said MWM.

A few days into the holiday MWM developed a really 'bad' stomach and had to take to his bed. Luckily for me our son D, (who was 14 at the time), was with us, so I had company on the beach and a 'man' to escort me to dinner that night. D stayed faithfully by my side after dinner whilst I had a couple of drinks at our hotel bar, suddenly all the power went off and the barman Yasar produced a whole load of candles, which he positioned all along the bar and on the tables. I don't know what it is about candlelight, probably because it makes everything look dim, but Yasar decided I looked ravishing and proceeded to chat me up! He'd already determined that MWM had taken to his bed and wasn't likely to be surfacing until morning. I wasn't worried I'd had experience of this sort of thing, (though not a lot I might add), and D was within shouting distance if I need to make a quick getaway! Then I heard this voice

"Hi where's your husband tonight?"

Turning to the source of the question I saw Turkish Beauty, Wayne and the adorable one sitting just a few feet away. 'She speaks good English' I thought and I wanted to know if my 'fairytale' was true.

"He's ill" I explained, "would you mind if I sat with you a while I'm getting in a bit of hot water with the barman here?" I asked whilst Yasar was clearing the tables at the other end of the bar out of earshot.

"Course not, come and sit down" Beauty invited.

I introduced myself and D and couldn't wait to hear how they'd met so I could confirm my story to MWM the following morning. I must add here that I didn't completely ignore MWM's plight, I kept sending D up with bottles of water to make sure he was OK!

How wrong could I have been - she wasn't Turkish at all - she was a Brit through and through. Well we all got on like a house on fire and one drink led to another until we eventually retired for the night promising to meet up the following day, which wasn't difficult as we were staying in the same hotel!

The following morning I was awake with the lark, as usual, though I always wear sunglasses to breakfast as camouflage in case I made a fool of myself the night before! MWM was feeling almost back to normal and joined me and D for breakfast. The beautiful one didn't emerge until later, but the straw hatted one, or Wayne as I called him, and the adorable one were already up and at 'em. I introduced MWM to Wayne and the adorable one but apparently they'd already met! Oh that's good I thought "How, when, where" I enquired.

"I'll tell you later" said MWM.

It seems MWM had be wallowing in the shallows (he doesn't swim) and Wayne had inadvertently splashed him! Not good. MWM doesn't like it - splashing or water. He must have pulled a face because apparently Wayne had asked him "what do you come on holiday for?" to which MWM had replied "To get away from people like you!" MWM told me all this later in the day, after Beauty and I had agreed we'd had such a good time it would be a great idea if we all ate together that evening. Ho, ho I can hear you saying - this is going to be fun.

Well you're not wrong....

We had the most fantastic time for the rest of the holiday everyone thought we'd known each other for ever. When the beauties went on a two day trip I felt like my right arm had been ripped off and Beauty said the same when they got back. We were inseparable, we laughed until our sides ached and we drank enough to sink a battle ship! We party, party, partied, we even had a party on the beach, and we were asked to move further up the beach because we were making so much noise, well not just us, some of the other guests joined us too! Beauty even rescued me from the gypsies, when I was so 'partied' I sat down in the sand with some locals who were asleep on the beach as we moved away from the hotel. What a pal!

When the end of the holiday came our flight home was early in the day, whereas their's was a night flight, so we had to leave before them . We were in tears Beauty and I, promising to write and phone and visit. We have met lots of people on holiday with whom we've exchanged telephone numbers and addresses and we have kept in touch with some, just as far as Christmas cards go, but none have become lifelong friends like this family. Some of you may recognise them.

Here they are Turkish Beauty, Wayne and the Adorable One.





Here's all of us together on the day we were leaving

and here's another with me using the 'straw hat' as a fruit bowl.

I'm not sure who the young girl is sitting next to Wayne I think she fancied our D!

And here's me and Beauty sitting on the balcony after consuming a bottle of brandy at 4 in the morning! God alone knows why she's hiding her face!

For those of you who don't recognise them they are Queenie, Math and Nat.

They attended both our boys' weddings, they grieved when our first two grandchildren died, they know more about us than some of our own family. We usually visit each other about every 4 months or so for the weekend but Queenie is waiting for a hip operation and is really struggling at the moment, and of course I have been recovering from my knee op, so we haven't been able to do this for about 16 months, though we talk every week on the phone. MWM and I went to visit Queenie and Math last week, just for the day, and persuaded them to come and stay with us on New Year's Day so we could all go out for a Chinese meal and generally have a good time - which is what we do best. They are both a good deal younger than MWM and I, but that's no barrier to the fun we have.

After our meal we came back home and had a few drinks and we got talking about how we met 17 years ago (18 in August 2008). The story I made up about them on holiday has always made them laugh, and Queenie and I both think that and had it been down to the men we would have been ships that passed in the night. But, Queenie and I believe we are soul sisters, so were meant to meet. Queenie is the sister I never had and my bestest friend, and she asked me to blog about that fateful holiday 17 years ago. So this is for you my wonderful, wonderful friend - Turkish Beauty!

Friday 55 Flash Fiction #8 January Sales

January Sales

How much was it? he asked.

Oh it was a lot less than you might think.

Yes, but we don’t need it yet, why did you buy it now?

Because we decided we want a baby as soon as possible after we get married and it was in the sale!

But Amy, we’re only 13!

Friday 55 Flash Fiction is brought to you by susiestheboss but is hosted again this week by g-man.

Never argue with a woman......

Someone emailed me this and I thought it was so funny I have to share it.


One morning the husband returns after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap.


Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out. She motors out a short distance, anchors, and reads her book. Along comes a Game Warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside the woman and says,


'Good morning, Ma'am. What are you doing?'


'Reading a book,' she replies, (thinking, 'Isn't that obvious?')


'You're in a Restricted Fishing Area,' he informs her


'I'm sorry, officer, but I'm not fishing. I'm reading'


'Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment. I'll have to take you in and write you up.'


'For reading a book?' she replies


'You're in a Restricted Fishing Area,' he informs her again,


'I'm sorry, officer, but I'm not fishing. I'm reading'


'Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment. I'll have to take you in and write you up.'


'If you do that, I'll have to charge you with Sexual assault,' says the woman.


'But I haven't even touched you,' says the game warden.


'That's true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment.'


'Have a nice day ma'am,' and he left.


MORAL: Never argue with a woman who reads. It's likely she can also think.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

To All My Blogging Friends

may 2008 be your best year ever!

Whatever your New Year's resolutions I wish you luck.

I've only made one this year - to lose weight and get fitter - I'll keep you posted.