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Wednesday 15 April 2009

Portrait Of Words # 8



Jeff (A Word in Edgewise POW) has started up this monthly challenge, derived from a previous challenge from R.E.H.'s "Picture Fiction Challenge". Do pop over to Jeff's to read the other entries, you won't be disappointed. You can get the portraits for this month's challenge here.



The object is to:

Write a story of any length or style. Long or short, comedy or tragedy, fact or fiction, etc,etc... it's up to you.

Use each of the picture representations in your story. (one from the wild card options)


Main Character:
Your story can be told through or about this person, i.e. first or third person. Either way, his involvement in the story should be a focal point. Feel free to have as many or as few additional characters as you wish.

 
Backdrop:
This will create the setting for your story. It can take place at the location depicted, be a destination to it, or be a journey from it.


 
Purpose:
This is what drives or motivates the main character to action. It can also be viewed as the objective of the story.

 
 
Item:
This object should have a significant value to the main character, backdrop or purpose of the story.

 
 
Wild Cards:
Writers choice here. Choose *one* of the three options to use in your story anyway you see fit.

Photo Credits: Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike License
(From Flickr.com/creative commons,)
Main Character- Laurl
Backdrop- TravelingMango
Purpose- Jamarr
Item- romorebianco
Wild Card #1- Daniel Y. Go
Wild Card #2- flowers & machinery
Wild Card #3- frightenrabbit


Here's my story:
 
 
Jacob Abby sat in the sweltering courtroom. Beads of sweat peppered his brow and dark stains of perspiration were seeping through his shirt under his arms and down his back.


Jacob waited patiently for the electric fan to waft some air his way as he listened intently to the evidence, trying not to give anything away, keeping an impassive expression. He made notes as the prosecutor presented the case. The evidence and photographs of the victim’s injuries were horrendous.

The victim had smashed up the bar belonging to the defendant during a bar-room brawl. However, the defendent lost all reason and instead of calling in the police he decided to punish the man himself.

He and a friend had picked the man up and had taken him to an out-of-the-way lock up where they tortured him by drilling through his hands and feet before shooting him. Had he not involved his friend he probably would have got away with it, but his friend had a big mouth and had blabbed, it wasn’t long before the police picked him up and matched the evidence to him. His so-called friend had done a deal with the police, he told them everything, he wouldn’t be prosecuted for murder.

During the trial Jacob noticed some jurors were shaking or nodding their heads and made notes of that too. He could probably guess which way they were going to vote. Some of the women jurors held handkerchiefs over their mouths when they were looking at the photographs of the victim, he had to admit they were gruesome. Jacob was annoyed when he noticed a juror pretending to take notes, when in fact he was doing a crossword concealed in his notepad. The least they could do is actually pay attention, he’d have to mention that later.

The defending lawyer tried to discredit the informer without success. He wasn’t as persuasive as the prosecutor and the evidence was overwhelming anyway. The trial only took a couple of days, which was a blessing in a way as the weather was forecasted to get hotter and he wasn’t sure how much more heat he could stand.

The jury retired to consider the evidence. How long would they take, guilty or not guilty?

“Members of the jury, have you reached a verdict on which you are all agreed?” asked the judge.

The foreman stood “We have your honour” he replied.

The clerk gave the name of the accused asking “How do you find the defendant, Guilty or Not Guilty?”

“Guilty” the foreman answered.

Jacob smiled. He had no doubt the man was guilty and he’d persuaded those jurors who weren’t sure to vote guilty too, to ensure the unanimous decision the judge required. He’d also reported the juror who had been doing the crossword, he deserved to get into trouble , being a juror was a big responsibility and should be taken seriously!

28 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wonderful story. I love the power of persuasion especially when it is done correctly. Good for him reporting that crossword juror. I really liked this. Great work :)

Unknown said...

Creative story. As usual, well done!

Maggie May said...

Wasn't expecting the juror doing the crossword bit! Good story.
Yes, it is really fun to see the different ways the writers use the pictures. In my case I don't use the pictures, except in the initial decision on the storyline & which way it will go!

Flowerpot said...

another great story Ak - and love those pics too.

TBM said...

Oh, you know I love these!! Well done :-)

Connie T. said...

I do have one question though. In the 3rd paragraph you said

The victim had smashed up the bar belonging to the defendant during a bar-room brawl.
Is the victim the dead guy? but he and a guy picked up a guy and killed him.

Finding Pam said...

Akelamula,You have written another great story. I enjoyed it.

G-Man said...

I wish I had the time for this, you hang with some very creative peeps Ake.
Just as you are!

Akelamalu said...

Ah yes, the power of persuasion Thom, I wish I had it! ;) Glad you enjoyed the story m'deario. :)

Oh thanks Nick :)

Yes that's what I meant Maggie how we all see a different story in the pictures. :)

The pictures give the idea behind whatever story we wish to weave Flowerpot :)

Glad you like them JAPRA x

Oh you're right Connie, it's not clear. Thanks for pointing that out I've been back and corrected it now - it wasn't the victim who picked anyone up it was the defendent. :0

Cheers Pam I'm pleased you enjoyed it.

I think you would do a marvelous job of these if only you had the time G-man xx

GEWELS said...

Nice job Akela... You do come up with some very creative stories.

Thanks for visiting. I've been remiss in blogging these days. It's not that I don't love you though!
xoxo

Daryl said...

Ah .. well done, fooled me there I was sure Jacob was the judge ..

Nessa said...

Very well done.

maryt/theteach said...

Akalamalu, thanks very much for the story and Stevie Wonder! :)

tony said...

Yes! Yes! Good Stuff.I,m off to London tommorrow!Have A Fine Weekend.Regards
Tony.

Akelamalu said...

Nice to see you back Gewels, glad you liked the story. x

Ah glad you liked the little twist Daryl :)

Thanks Nessa x

Glad you enjoyed the story and the music Mary x

Gosh you're on the move AGAIN Tony LOL Have a great time. :)

Spiky Zora Jones said...

when a story gets my emoptions going...it has to be good.

And this story is so very good.

Ciao sweetie...

Thom - - Dr. John said...

To think that someone on a murder trial would actually be doing a crossword. yikes!

Thanks for joining in with another great story.

Cath said...

Well constructed. Had me fooled too as to who Jacob is.

Dr.John said...

Very well done.
I always like a little surprise on the end.

Ron said...

This is the first of your Portrait of Words I've read and as usual, my friend...you are one clever writer!

Like some others have expressed, I LOVED the whole crossword puzzle element!

Great job, Akelamalu!

Thoroughly enjoyed!
X

Lu' said...

Good story if he would have called the cops first he would be at the victims trail and not his own.

david mcmahon said...

Hi Pearl, Jeff's challenges are always terrific. And your stories equally so.

Akelamalu said...

Oh you're too kind to me Spiky, thanks honey. x

Actually someone in England did do a crossword when on jury service Jeff, though it was some time ago!

I'm pleased the twist worked Cath. :)

Me too Dr. John ;)

You've missed my POWs Ron??? How could you??? (wink). Glad you liked it m'dear. x

More than likely Lu!

Why thank you David coming from a 'proper' writer that is a compliment indeed. :)

Cloudia said...

Your writing goes down smooth...
leaving tart and pleasant afterglow.Well done as usual my island sistah! Aloha

Linda said...

You have such an amazing way with words that one can actually feel the heat in the courtroom while reading this!

Alice (in BC Canada) said...

A very well written story, Akelamalu. I much enjoyed reading it. Thanks for the totally wonderful comment you left on my blog today, and yes, it is very interesting and wonderful how everyone has a different take on the photo prompts, and writes a totally different story. Such fun.

Akelamalu said...

Oh thankyou Cloudia I'm so pleased you enjoyed it.

How kind you are in your comments Linda, thankyou m'dear. xx

I'm pleased you enjoyed my story Alice, it is fun writing them and reading others. :)

A Lady's Life said...

Jacob certainly left us wondering who he was and finding out he was a part of the jury was interesting. Also he seemed very anxious to have this jury conclude while criticising the crossword guy for not paying attention.
Very good story :)