Signs....

 Sign  over a Gynecologist's Office:  "Dr.  Jones, at your cervix." 

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   In a  Podiatrist's office: "Time  wounds all heels."  

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 In  a Vets waiting room:  "Be  back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"  

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In  a Restaurant window:  "Don't  stand there and be hungry; come on in and get  fed up." 

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In  the front yard of a Funeral Home:  "Drive  carefully. We'll wait."  

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And  don't forget the sign at a  RADIATOR  SHOP: "Best  place in town to take a leak." 

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Sign  on the back of yet another 
Septic  Tank Truck: "Caution  - This Truck is full of Political  Promises"  

On a  Septic Tank Truck: Yesterday's  Meals on Wheels 

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On  a Plumber's  truck:  "We  repair what your husband fixed."  

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 On  another Plumber's truck:  "Don't  sleep with a drip. Call your plumber."  

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On  a Church's Bill board:  "7  days without God makes one weak."

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At  a Tyre Store  "Invite  us to your next blowout."  

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On  an Electrician's truck:  "Let  us remove your shorts."

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In  a Non-smoking Area:  "If  we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and  take appropriate action.."  

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 On  a Maternity Room door:  "Push.  Push. Push." 

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At  an Optometrist's Office:  "If  you don't see what you're looking for, you've  come to the right place."  

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  On a  Taxidermist's window:  "We  really know our stuff." 

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 On  a Fence: "Salesmen  welcome! Dog food is expensive!"

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 At  a Car Dealership: "The  best way to get back on your feet - miss a car  payment." 

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 Outside  a Car Exhaust Store:  "No  appointment necessary. We hear you  coming."