Friday 55 Flash Fiction #178 Torture...

He hated it when they washed him with that horrible medicated stuff.

It stung like hell, made his back feel as though it was on fire

and the water was too hot, scalding him.

Why do they do it, why can't they leave me alone?

They're trying to get rid of me....

because I'm bacteria.

Friday 55 Flash Fiction is brought to you by G-man (Mr Knowitall). The idea is you write a story in exactly 55 words. If you want to take part pop over and let G-man know when you've posted your 55.

Our latest jaunt.......

was to Loughborough.  The point of us going was to experience a ride on the Steam Train from Loughborougth to Leicester via Quorn, on the Great Central Railway, then when we booked the train and the hotel we found out that there was a Real Ale Beer Festival taking place at the station whilst we were there -YAY.   Unfortunately the day before we were embarking on our little jaunt MWM discovered that there were no public trains running on the line on the Friday, only on the Saturday and Sunday, and we were due to come home on Saturday morning as we had a wedding reception to attend on Saturday evening.   Bugger!

Anyway we decided we would make the best of the trip, after all there was a Beer Festival on.  We had to get the train to Sheffield then change for the trip to Loughborough, arriving at our hotel The Ramada at approx 3 p.m.   We were given the key to our room but when we went in the bed hadn't been made up so I telephoned reception to let them know.   Within 5 minutes the nice man who had booked us in was knocking at our door with the key to an upgraded room - very nice start to our stay.    We quickly unpacked (there wasn't much as we were only there for 2 days) and then set off to do a quick reccy of the town centre, mainly looking for places to eat and drink, of course we had to sample a couple of pubs offering real ales on our way round.    We found The Moomba Restaurant, which serves Australian cuisine, which we had seen when we Googled places to eat in Loughborough and decided to telephone to make a reservation when we went back to the hotel to freshen up.    The food was really good and the atmosphere was very relaxed, a good start to the evening.   After dining we went to a couple of pubs but by 10 p.m. we were really tired and decided to go back to the hotel and have an early night.

When we found out we wouldn't be able to have a steam train ride we Googled 'what to do in Loughborough' and found this

John Taylor and Co, Bell Foundry, who continue a line of bellfounding which has been unbroken since the middle of the 14th Century when Johannes de Stafford was active only 10 miles from the site of the present foundry.   Since 1784 the business has been in the hands of the Taylor family.  In 1839 the business settled in Loughborough and is now proud to operate the largest bellfoundry in the world and is one of only two in the country the other one being in Whitechapel.  Taylors are the makers of Great Paul in 1881, the largest bell in the UK, which resides in St Paul's Cathedral in London.  Taylors also made Malta's Siege Bell and bells for York Minster.

We were given a tour of the fascinating museum by a nice young man who also explained the process for making bells and we were surprised to learn that one of the key ingredients in making a bell is horse manure!  We got to ring some of the bells in the museum and the sounds they emitted were fabulous.  I've put together a little slide show of what we saw in the museum and the foundry itself and if you every find yourself in Loughborough with a couple of hours to spare I would highly recommend you visit this fascinating historical place.




After our bell foundry experience we went in a little cafe for a sandwich and a coffee before heading for

where the Real Ale Beer Festival was taking place. We paid £3 to get on the station platform then £10 for a card to pay for the beer and £2 for the pint glass.   Expensive you might think but anything not used on the £10 card was refundable (we used it all, surprise surprise) and the £2 was refundable on the glass. Glass and card in hand we proceeded to sample the real ales on offer.

We sampled such delights as 'Roll in the Hay', 'Welcome To The Freak Show', 'Westoe IPA', 'Spellbound', 'White Hart', 'Prowler', 'Rivet Catcher', 'Magnum Mild', 'Big Red' and 'Hoare Farm Rosehip Cider'.   Those were between us mind, we didn't both try them all LOL.    We met some really nice people and enjoyed some interesting conversations about real ale pubs all over the country.

MWM was happy even though he didn't get to ride on the steam train, he did get to see some and took photos of course.   The numbers don't mean anything to me but they may to some of you train buffs out there.



After a great afternoon we headed back for the hotel to have a little rest before going to a lovely Chinese restaurant 'The Laughing Buddha' just around the corner from the hotel, where we had the special set meal for two which consisted of

Special Platter (prawn toast, spare ribs, crispy seaweed, spring rolls and chicken satay)

****

Crispy Aromatic Duck with pancakes

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Sizzling Chicken with Green Pepper and Black Bean Sauce

Crispy Chilli Beef in Bird's Nest

Yung Chow Fried Rice

****

A nice bottle of house wine

Coffee to follow

a superb meal in very pleasant surroundings with fabulous service, thoroughly recommended.

Full to overflowing we left the restaurant and walked round the corner to the Moon and Bell to finish off the night with a couple of drinks before heading back to the hotel and our bed for a good night's sleep before an early start the following morning on our trip home.

All in all we had a great couple of days in Loughborough.  No doubt we will have to go back at some point so that we can actually ride on the train from Loughborough to Leicester, which is why we arranged the trip in the first place.

Succinctly Yours - A Microfiction Meme #26

Grandma at Grandma's Goulash provides a picture and a word prompt for this Microfiction Meme and the rules are use the photo as inspiration for a story of 140 characters OR 140 words.

Want more challenge? Use the word of the week in your story. This part is optional.

This week's word is MIRED here's the picture and my offering using the picture and word of the week  in 140 characters, including spaces and punctuation.

They were having great fun playing in the leaves.

Little did they know what lurked beneath,

until they became mired in it a few minutes later.

The Bathing Suit (by a middle-age woman - unknown)

When I was a child in the 1950s, the bathing suit for the mature figure  was-boned, trussed and reinforced, not so much sewn as engineered.  They  were built to hold back and uplift, and they did a good job. Today's stretch fabrics are designed for the prepubescent girl with a  figure carved from a potato chip.  The mature woman has a choice, she can either go up front to the maternity department and try on a floral suit with a skirt, coming away looking like a hippopotamus that escaped from Disney's Fantasia, or she can wander around every run-of-the-mill department store trying to make a sensible choice from what amounts to a designer range of fluorescent  rubber bands.  What choice did I have?  I wandered around, made my sensible choice and entered the chamber of horrors known as the fitting room.  The first thing I noticed was the extraordinary tensile strength of the stretch material.  The Lycra used in bathing costumes was developed, I believe,  by NASA to launch small rockets from a slingshot, which gives the added bonus that if you manage to actually lever yourself into one, you would be protected from shark attacks.  Any shark taking a swipe at your passing midriff would immediately suffer whiplash.  I fought my way into the bathing suit, but as I twanged the shoulder strap in place I gasped in horror, my boobs had disappeared!  Eventually, I found one boob cowering under my left armpit.  It took a while to find the other.  At last I located it flattened beside my seventh rib.  The problem is that modern bathing suits have no bra cups.  The mature woman is now meant to wear her boobs spread across her chest like a speed bump.  I realigned my speed bump and lurched toward the mirror to take a full view assessment.  The bathing suit fit all right, but unfortunately it only fitted  those bits of me willing to stay inside it.  The rest of me oozed out rebelliously from top, bottom and sides.  I looked like a lump of Playdoh wearing undersized cling wrap.  As I tried to work out where all those extra bits had come from, the prepubescent sales girl popped her head through the curtain, "Oh, there you are," she said, admiring the bathing suit.  I replied that I wasn't so sure and asked what else she had to show me. I tried on a cream crinkled one that made me look like a lump of masking tape, and a floral two-piece that gave the appearance of an oversized napkin in a serving ring.  I struggled into a pair of leopard-skin bathers with ragged frills and came out looking like Tarzan's Jane, pregnant with triplets and having a rough day.  I tried on a black number with a midriff fringe and looked like a jellyfish in  mourning.  I tried on a bright pink pair with such a high cut leg I thought I  would have to wax my eyebrows to wear them.  Finally, I found a suit that fit, it was a two-piece affair with a  shorts-style bottom and a loose blouse-type top.  It was cheap, comfortable, and bulge-friendly, so I bought it.  My ridiculous search had a successful outcome, I figured.  When I got it home, I found a label that read, "Material might become transparent in water."  So, if you happen to be on the beach or near any other body of water this year and I'm there too, I'll be the one in cut-off jeans and a T-shirt!  You'd better be laughing or rolling on the floor by this time.  Life isn't about how to survive the storm, but how to dance in the rain, with or without a stylish bathing suit! Ring any bells ladies????  LOL

 I'm off on a jaunt tomorrow, which I will tell you about next week.  Be good while I'm away. 

Succinctly Yours - A Microfiction Meme #25

Grandma at Grandma's Goulash provides a picture and a word prompt for this Microfiction Meme and the rules are use the photo as inspiration for a story of 140 characters OR 140 words.

Want more challenge? Use the word of the week in your story. This part is optional.

This week's word is BENEFICIAL here's the picture and my offering using the picture and word of the week  in 140 characters, including spaces and punctuation.

Although it was giving Benjamin a headache,

Juliette assured him that it was beneficial to him that they hold hands whilst they were playing.

Friday 55 Flash Fiction #177 New Doctor..

"The new doctor is wonderful" said Matron

"the patients love him and he's so polite.

“Here he is now” she told the new nurse.

"I know him" said the nurse

"he's only been here a couple of weeks right?”

"That's right, how did you know?" replied Matron.

"He's my neighbour,

and he's not a doctor!"

Friday 55 Flash Fiction is brought to you by G-man (Mr Knowitall). The idea is you write a story in exactly 55 words. If you want to take part pop over and let G-man know when you've posted your 55.

Advice for travellers to Australia....

These were posted on an Australian tourism website and the answers are the actual responses by the website officials, who obviously have a great sense of humour (not to mention a low tolerance threshold for cretins!).

__________________________________________________
Q: Does it ever get windy in Australia ? I have never seen it rain on TV, how do the plants grow? ( UK )

A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.
__________________________________________________

Q: Will I be able to see kangaroos in the street? ( USA )

A: Depends how much you've been drinking.
__________________________________________________

Q: I want to walk from Perth to Sydney - can I follow the railroad tracks? ( Sweden )

A: Sure, it's only three thousand miles, take lots of water. 
__________________________________________________

Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Australia? Can you send me a list of them in Brisbane, Cairns, Townsville and Hervey Bay ? ( UK )

A: What did your last slave die of?
__________________________________________________

Q:Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Australia ? ( USA )

A: A-Fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe.
Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the Pacific which does not
... Oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Kings Cross. Come naked.
__________________________________________________

Q: Which direction is North in Australia ? (USA )

A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions. 
_________________________________________________

Q: Can I bring cutlery into Australia ? ( UK )

A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do...
__________________________________________________

Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? ( USA )

A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is
Oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Kings Cross, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.
__________________________________________________

Q: Can I wear high heels in Australia ? ( UK )
A: You are a British politician, right?
__________________________________________________

Q: Are there supermarkets in Sydney and is milk available all year round? ( Germany )

A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter/gatherers.
Milk is illegal.
__________________________________________________

Q: Please send a list of all doctors in Australia who can dispense rattlesnake serum. ( USA )

A: Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca which is where YOU come from.
All Australian snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and make good pets.
__________________________________________________

Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Australia, but I forget its name. It's a kind of bear and lives in trees. ( USA )

A: It's called a Drop Bear. They are so called because they drop out of Gum trees and eat the brains of anyone walking underneath them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking.
__________________________________________________

Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can sell it in Australia ? ( USA )

A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.
__________________________________________________

Q: Do you celebrate Christmas in Australia ? ( France )

A: Only at Christmas.
__________________________________________________

Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? ( USA )

A: Yes, but you'll have to learn it first.

Succinctly Yours - A Microfiction Meme #24

Grandma at Grandma's Goulash provides a picture and a word prompt for this Microfiction Meme and the rules are use the photo as inspiration for a story of 140 characters OR 140 words.

Want more challenge? Use the word of the week in your story. This part is optional.

This week's word is METHODICAL here's the picture and my offering using the picture and word of the week  in 140 characters, including spaces and punctuation.

Through the window Melanie watched her husband lining up the children’s toys.

He’d complained she was methodical but she was sure he had OCD!

Remembering Nine Eleven..

The world will never forget.

Friday 55 Flash Fiction #176 Alone...

The baby clung to his dead mother.   

Surrounded by the mutilated bodies of his family,

hacked, dismembered, bloody.

The gang had come at dawn with guns and machetes, sparing none.

He lay silently, they hadn't seen him, he was spared.

Much later......

the ranger picked up the orphaned gorilla and put him in the truck.

Friday 55 Flash Fiction is brought to you by G-man (Mr Knowitall). The idea is you write a story in exactly 55 words. If you want to take part pop over and let G-man know when you've posted your 55.

Dixieland Part 11...

Our last day in Atlanta dawned and we realised it was also our last day in America!    We were due to fly home in the evening but had a busy day ahead of us before we actually left.

Before embarking on our first excursion for the day we took at photograph of a house quite near to our hotel.

Margaret Mitchell's house.   Of course you know that Margaret Mitchell wrote 'Gone With The Wind' and this tied in nicely with our trip which was to take the 'Road To Tara', in Jonesboro, Georgia, home of the fictional Tara Plantation from her classic novel.

Arriving at the Road to Tara Museum we met up with a local costume historian who guided us through the  museum  and joined us on the coach as we toured the area, entertaining us with both historical and hysterical information about this deep southern town.  The museum contains many exhibits such as detailed and accurate reproductions of the costumes worn by Vivien Leigh (Scarlett O'Hara) and other stars from the film, as well as Margaret Mitchell's china, and an authentic 'Sherman's necktie' (a section of rail twisted into a loop so as to be useless to a railroad company) from the Civil War.   It was an entertaining and informative tour and one I would certainly recommend to anyone visiting the area.

Our next stop was a tour of the World of Coca Cola.  A unique experience that includes interactive exhibits, historical memorabilia, a sensory 4D film, a functioning bottling line, and the chance to sample over 60 different refreshing flavours from around the world.  There is so much to see and it's very informative, a delight for children and we didn't realise there were so many different flavours of Coca Cola!

After our tour of the World Coca Cola we went in here,

where we enjoyed a burger and a milk shake,

whilst reflecting on all the wonderful things and places we had seen on our 12 day trip to the U.S.A.    Then, all too soon, it was time to head back to the hotel to meet Alice (our tour director) and Jerome (our coach driver) who were waiting to take us to the airport to catch our flight home.

We had a wonderful time and the places and things we saw and the people we met will provide some wonderful memories.   We cannot praise Alice and Jerome enough, they really made the whole tour a delight, Jetsave should be very proud of them.   Alice was a fountain of knowledge about every place we stopped, we never had to find a bank to change travellers cheques we just signed them and Alice handed over the money, if we wanted a postcard sending we just wrote it out and gave it to Alice with $1 and she posted it and we never had to queue to check into a hotel because Alice was in there first booking us all in and then gave us our room keys.   Jerome made sure our luggage was on the coach every time we moved to a different location, his careful driving (over 2200 miles from end to end) made all the journeys we took comfortable and we always felt safe, so I'd just like to say a big THANKYOU to them both for making our holiday such a pleasurable one.

I hope you've enjoyed our Dixieland Tour as much as we did.   We're now planning our next trip to the States with the same tour company (Jetsave) for August 2012 taking in Los Angeles,Grand Canyon, Las Vegas, Fresno, Sonora, Lake Tahoe, San Francisco, Lompoc and back to Los Angeles - we can't wait!

Read Dixieland Part 1 here
Read Dixieland Part 2 here
Read Dixieland Part 3 here
Read Dixieland Part 4 here
Read Dixieland Part 5 here
Read Dixieland Part 6 here
Read Dixieland Part 7 here
Read Dixieland Part 8 here
Read Dixieland Part 9 here
Read Dixieland Part 10 here

Succinctly Yours - A Microfiction Meme #23

Grandma at Grandma's Goulash provides a picture and a word prompt for this Microfiction Meme and the rules are use the photo as inspiration for a story of 140 characters OR 140 words.

Want more challenge? Use the word of the week in your story. This part is optional.

This week's word is PRACTICE here's the picture and my offering using the picture and word of the week  in 140 characters, including spaces and punctuation.

As a new GP John was looking forward to starting his new practice in the quaint little town,

but that was before he saw the surgery building.

Friday 55 Flash Fiction #175 Demolition...

Harry removed the doors and windows of the conservatory and smiled as he wielded the sledgehammer, demolishing the walls.

Arriving home from work Janice watched open mouthed.

"What do you think you're doing?" screamed Janice.

Harry carried on.

"Stop, stop now please!" pleaded Janice.

"Too late" said Harry grinning smugly,

"you should've paid the bill!"

Friday 55 Flash Fiction is brought to you by G-man (Mr Knowitall). The idea is you write a story in exactly 55 words. If you want to take part pop over and let G-man know when you've posted your 55.