A farmer stopped by the local mechanic shop to have his truck fixed. They couldn't do it while he waited, so he said he didn't live far and would just walk home. On the way home he stopped at the hardware store and bought a bucket and a gallon of paint. He then stopped by the feed store and picked up a couple of chickens and a goose. However, struggling outside the store he now had a problem - how to carry his entire purchases home.
While he was scratching his head he was approached by a little old lady who told him she was lost. She asked, 'Can you tell me how to get to 1603 Mockingbird Lane ?' The farmer said, 'Well, as a matter of fact, my farm is very close to that house I would walk you there but I can't carry this lot.' The old lady suggested,
'Why don't you put the can of paint in the bucket. Carry the bucket in one hand, put a chicken under each arm and carry the goose in your other hand?'
'Why thank you very much,' he said and proceeded to walk the old girl home. On the way he says 'Let's take my short cut and go down this alley. We'll be there in no time.'
The little old lady looked him over cautiously then said, I am a lonely widow without a husband to defend me.. How do I know that when we get in the alley you won't hold me up against the wall, pull up my skirt, and have your way with me?'
The farmer said, 'Holy smokes lady! I'm carrying a bucket, a gallon of paint, two chickens, and a goose. How in the world could I possibly hold you up against the wall and do that?'
The old lady replied, 'Set the goose down, cover him with the bucket, put the paint on top of the bucket, and I'll hold the chickens
While he was scratching his head he was approached by a little old lady who told him she was lost. She asked, 'Can you tell me how to get to 1603 Mockingbird Lane ?' The farmer said, 'Well, as a matter of fact, my farm is very close to that house I would walk you there but I can't carry this lot.' The old lady suggested,
'Why don't you put the can of paint in the bucket. Carry the bucket in one hand, put a chicken under each arm and carry the goose in your other hand?'
'Why thank you very much,' he said and proceeded to walk the old girl home. On the way he says 'Let's take my short cut and go down this alley. We'll be there in no time.'
The little old lady looked him over cautiously then said, I am a lonely widow without a husband to defend me.. How do I know that when we get in the alley you won't hold me up against the wall, pull up my skirt, and have your way with me?'
The farmer said, 'Holy smokes lady! I'm carrying a bucket, a gallon of paint, two chickens, and a goose. How in the world could I possibly hold you up against the wall and do that?'
The old lady replied, 'Set the goose down, cover him with the bucket, put the paint on top of the bucket, and I'll hold the chickens
28 comments:
hahaha old people jokes always creep me out!!!
A jolly chuckle to brighten up a Monday morning!
clever lady ;)
old people are very wise!
smiles, bee
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
were theres a will theres a way.....................
:) Im gonna try that one lol.... it might be me only way of getting some lovin LOL
x
Bwhahahahahahaha!
This was BRILLIANT!
Thanks for sharing a hearty laugh, my friend.
Enjoyed it!
Have a great Monday!
X
Smart woman!
ROFLMAO...too funny...they always have an answer. Loved it :)
I remember the laughter ...
I need to get back in the habit of dropping by again no matter how busy life gets. Hope all's well with you and yours and that you're still doodling as you write those AMAZING Wordzlls ;--)
Hugs and blessings,
Really Al? Why?
A chuckle is always welcome on a Monday morning Dumdad :)
Wasn't she just Dianne? ;)
They truly are Bee - I'm one myself! LOL
Definitely Tony!
LOL what you like Marmie? LOL
Ithought you'd like that one Ron :)
Very smart Daryl! ;)
Of course Thom they have a lot of experience! ;)
Long time no see Storyteller, it's lovely to have you back. x
How old is old is old is old? Huh? Can you answer that question, Missy? Hmmmm???
Good one! Love finds a way!
Poor farmer didn't know what it cost to get a little help.
Funny.
Ha ha! I guess she saw a golden opportunity.
She certainly is helpful. Knows her stuff lol
Definitely a wise old woman she was! I wonder if he followed her advice?!?
That was naughty!
I am a little old lady!
Given me ideas LOL!
Well I'm almost 60 Mimi and I'm not old! ;)
! Gleds ?
Haha, yes it does Buff!
If only he'd known before he asked Dr. John! ;)
It was probably her ONLY opportunity Citizen! LOL
Helpful yes, opportunist definitely Lady's Life :)
Oooh Linda I dread to think! LOL
Maggie you're as old as the man you feel - pick a young 'un! LOL
I love learning from older people as they are full of widsom.
Got a good chuckle from that one!
LOL! She's got it all figured out...
Oh, by the way, my 'zoiks' comment from a few posts back: Shaggy used to say that on the animated series 'Scooby Doo'. He used it as an exclamation of 'good gracious!' Because your twisty ending made me say 'Zoiks!'
Older people are full of wisdom salute, I'll remember that but I can't guarantee I'll be one of them! LOL
It made me chuckle too Crystalchick :)
She did Julia. I'm with you now on the zoiks comment hon. x
I'm with her all the way! Unless she wants privacy!
*snort*
My first laugh in days!
Thanks & aloha you Dear!!
I think she's desperate Rinkly Rimes and not bothered about privacy! ;)
Lovely to hear you laughing my dear Cloudia xx
ROTFL! That's the kind of old lady, I want to be!
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