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Friday, 27 November 2009

Friday 55 Flash Fiction # 98 Outcasts


Friday 55 Flash Fiction is brought to you by G-man (Mr Knowitall). The idea is you write a story in exactly 55 words. If you want to take part pop over and let G-man know when you've posted your 55.




Outside they huddled together for warmth, taking comfort in each other.

Feeling like outcasts, lepers, exiles, shunned, degraded.

Forever to be evicted from comfort and companionship.

No longer part of the accepted crowd, group, mainstream.

Since 'the law' had been passed they were destined to be outsiders, uncomfortable, cold, oppressed, abused.

All because they smoke!





I haven't smoked for 12 years but I do feel sorry for smokers now, especially in the pub when they have to go outside to enjoy a cigarette with their drink. The 'no smoking' law has killed the pub trade here, yet another one of our locals is due to close.

32 comments:

Flowerpot said...

I gave up smoking 13 years ago and don[t regret it but I agree with you about the whole nanny state business. What is the world coming to?

quilly said...

As a smoker I hated being sent to the alley to hide with my cigarettes like some kind of degenerate. Now that I am a non-smoker and have developed asthma from all those years of smoking, I can't help but hope such treatment makes more people quit and prevents others from starting. Not being able to breathe is a very scary thing.

Excellent story though!

buffalodick said...

I've never smoked as a habit, and I always get my back up when the government butts in on personal freedoms!

Empress Bee (of the High Sea) said...

i quit in the 80's but i have no tolerance for smoke. i got lung cancer 20 years after i quit. i will walk a block out of my way to not breathe smoke. i am very lucky to be alive, it was a miracle it was caught early and all i lost was a lung.

smiles, bee
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

Brian Miller said...

this one is a toss up for me...the rights that i think would be more affected are that of the biz owners. otherwise it is toss up between smokers and non-smokers. nice 55.

mine is up!

Susan at Stony River said...

Nice twist! Poor smokers---you had me thinking they were refugees at first. LOL

I believe in personal freedoms, but my sister died of lung cancer just a few years ago. So on one hand I'm glad to see the government do something that might lead to less smoking... on the other hand I'm aware that most people would like to make that choice for themselves...hmm.

Very thought-provoking 55, this!

Dr.John said...

I wish I could feel sorry for them but I don't.

anthonynorth said...

I know the feeling.

Thom said...

All the way through I kept thinking what is she going to make this. A cigarette smoker was the last thing I would have ever thought.

Well as a smoker, it just pisses me off that were are treated like second class low life. Yes I stink, yes I cough, yes I spend tons of money and yes it's a horrible habit over all, but I do it. And now here in Honolulu in public places you have to be at least 20 feet away from the door entrance to smoke. At the airport, all the smokers have to go out to the last medians farthest away from the airport to smoke...pfft. Great story my friend :) Loved it!!!

Monkey Man said...

I feel for the business owners, but smokers make their choice and should have to live with it. Most heart and lung diseases are directly attributable to smoking and all drive up the cost of health care.

As for 55's. This week my 55 is WAR!

Chef Kar said...

Definitely thought provoking. As a non-smoker I never felt terribly sorry for the smokers. I increased the places I patronized because I could breathe more easily ~ finally. So, for every smoker that may have left the building, there may have been more to take their place.

As for pub business being killed ~ that is the shame of it.

Controversial and well stated. Makes me think...which is always good (well, most of the time!)

I'm up too:
Friday Flash 55 ~ Memoirs

ann said...

just checked there were no creepy creatures around... yep it's safe this week ;>)

personally i'm pleased not to be subjected to secondary smoke everywhere i go... if people want to make themselves sick that's up to them, just don't inflict it on me - i worked with smokers who threatened to leave work if the law was enforced - it was a nightmare before and a nightmare after. firstly 'cos their smoke gave me a cough and i went home reeking of it, then when they couldn't smoke they were like bears with sore heads... agh!!!

sorry to be so blunt

also my daughter and her hubby smoke and it breaks my heart - i've seen the damage it has done to friends' skin - i dread to imagine what it's doing to their insides...

g-man said...

The next thing you know, the law will make you wear a helmet when you ride a motorcycle...
hey WAIT...THEY DO!!

Excellent 55 Ake...

Got a light?

Felicitas said...

Sucks to be a smoker, I guess. As a non-smoker, I have often wondered why so many are still so dedicated to this habit, knowing full-well how bad it is? Regardless, you've done a wonderful job of presenting the other side and I almost feel sorry for them.

Linda said...

I guess I would feel differently about it if second-hand smoke wasn't proven to cause cancer and is therefore a danger to everyone around it. Based on that, I've got to think that people did the right thing by passing a law to ban it.

Of course, bear in mind I have always been a non-smoker so I'm probably a bit prejudiced in my assessment!

Ron said...

EXCELLENT Flash 55, Akelamalu!!!

Well, being a smoker myself, I only smoke in my own home, so the 'no smoking law' doesn't really affect me. But I agree, the law has killed the pub trade.

Have a great weekend, m'dear!

X

Cloudia said...

Clever!

Sorry, but i do love to breathe too.

Aloha, Friend!


Comfort Spiral

aims said...

I don't feel sorry for them except for the fact that they can't kick an addiction and that they let some monstrous corporation run and ruin their body.

I will walk a mile to not be around cigarette smoke because even second-hand smoke kills.

Been there - had cancer - not interested in having it again.

cheshire wife said...

I can't feel sorry for smokers. For a long time nobody felt sorry for the non-smokers that were subject to secondary smoking. The smokers have a choice.

hope said...

As the only one who never smoked in my family [and yet I got asthma this year!] I have little sympathy for them.

Oh, not because I care that they smoke. Only when they feel THEIR right to puff trumps my right to breathe. :)

Well done!

Akelamalu said...

Thanks everyone for your comments. I'm grateful not to have to endure smoke when I go into for a drink or a meal but I think the Government should have given pubs a choice to be either smoking or a non smoking which is what happened in Spain. As usual our Government make sure we don't get a say in any decision!

secret agent woman said...

I don't. After watching both my grandfathers die slow, painful deaths from smoking-related illness adn knowing the effetc sof second-hand smoke, I am glad so many restaurants have banned smoking.

Joanna Jenkins said...

I never smoked but know lots of people who have quit.

Terrific 55! You nailed this one.

Have a great week.

jj

MomsJournal said...

I think business (bars) has gone up here since we passed the state law to ban smoking in all public places, but then again I think there are a lot less smokers here in the Seattle area then there are there.

Either way I think it should be the business owner that makes the choice.

Shrinky said...

I rarely go to a pub now, I used to enjoy a family pub lunch out at the weekend, I always sat in the non smoking section with my brood, and moved to the smokers corner for a cigarette, which suited everyone.

Thesedays, instead of going out to a restaurant, I prefer to splash out at home - and I confess I've gone from a decent cook to an excellent one in the process (so modest, too)!

I do intend to quit, I only restarted smoking five years ago after having been a non-smoker for over 15yrs, but even in my non-smoking days, if it was done considerately, I never objected to anyone else indulging in their habit. We appear to becoming a less and less tolerant society all round.

Akelamalu said...

I understand where you're coming from on this SAW.

Not enough people have quit Joanna unfortunately but it's their choice. Glad you liked the 55 and thanks for popping by. :)


Yes business owners should have been given the choice. It would be up to us as individuals whether or not we frequent their establishments MomsJournal.


I gave up smoking for two years then started again, then gave up for good 12 years ago. I couldn't afford to start smoking again now the price of cigarettes is just ridiculous isn't it Shrinky? Good luck with giving up this time. x

Daryl said...

Sad it killing the pub trade too bad its not killing the cigarette trade

Connie said...

Nice 55. I don't smoke, never have, but back in the day when you could smoke at work, I was always sick and coughing all the time from the smoke in the room. I was so happy they stopped smokers, smoking in the work place. I imagine it is unhealthy at bars, for the people that work there too.

Akelamalu said...

The only way to kill the cigarette trade Daryl would be a total ban on tobacco and the Government can't afford to do that they would lose too much revenue.

I agree with you Connie. However a lot of the people who work in bars smoke too. If the owners had been given a choice of smoking or non smoking establishment they need only have employed smokers don't you think?

Mimi Lenox said...

You never fail to make me gasp at the end of your Friday Flash Fiction. It's my favorite feature of yours. I hope soon you are going to have MORE time to write and delight us with your cerebral abiities!! Seriously!!!!

Anonymous said...

Well I agree but I dream the brief should have more info then it has.

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