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Friday, 11 September 2009

Friday 55 Flash Fiction # 89 The Message



Mugambi listened intently to the drum message from the neighbouring village.


It was from his brother Mwaka.

The sound was loud and clear, coming from the drum his father and brother had made together.

Sighing heavily Mugambi shrugged his shoulders.


He couldn't understand it.

Why didn't Mwaka just use a mobile phone like everyone else?





Friday 55 Flash Fiction is brought to you by G-man (Mr Knowitall). The idea is you write a story in exactly 55 words. If you want to take part pop over and let G-man know when you've posted your 55.

46 comments:

Thom said...

LOL. Good one. I was so into a village scene. And then poof. Great 55

Quilly said...

LOL! I was so in another place and time that I didn't even anticipate that cell phone!

Elaine said...

Tha was brilliant!

Flowerpot said...

Not the same though are they?!!

Deb said...

Using only 55 words you managed to build suspense and then a surprise ending! Very clever, my dear friend!

Dumdad said...

Excellent. Got me again with the sting in the tale....

buffalodick said...

The Industrial countries all all tangled in telephone wires, from days gone by... the Third world isn't as sky cluttered as ours!

snowelf said...

No one using a cell phone would be able to understand his conversation at least! :)

Happy Friday!!

--snow

Dulce said...

ha ha ha --this is cute, great funny. I love it. Thanks for the laughter you've given me.

Daryl said...

I giggled ..

Ron said...

I know I've shared this with you before, but I have to say it again...

...YOU ARE BRILLIANT!!!

Brava, m'dear...another GREAT one!

X

mrsnesbitt said...

Hilarious! Recognized some of the words from your novel! Excellent!

anthonynorth said...

That was quite a ring tone he was trying out :-)
Enjoyed that one. Great.

g-man said...

I don't know Ake...
I'm very low tech as well. Cell phones are tough to figure out sometime..
Excellent 55 though!!
Thanks for always playing so well. You are a Great friend, and please have a Kick-Ass Week-End...G

Indigo said...

Having just left a sorrowful reply to niyebyrds 9/11 tribute, I needed chearing up, you did that for me... I wiped away the tears of sadness and replaced them with tears of laughing ot your story, this Ilike, I will be back

Fandango said...

WE dragons were really surprised by that ending.
Wonderful 55

Dr.John said...

I just love when you do a surprise ending like that. I was thinking mystery, intrigue and got cell phone.
Best 55 today.

Mona said...

LOL! you could sell that idea for advertisement to a cellular company!

Brilliant!

Cat said...

Priceless!

San said...

You are so clever. I was expecting a tribal emergency. Then again, no cell phone might be just that.

Dianne said...

You mame me laugh out loud!
thanks

that last photo is priceless

Spiky Zora Jones said...

I read this and sweetie...I was laughing so loud, My friend Cindy came in...
She asked why I was laughingso hard. hehehehe. I pointed to the tube. Ha!

sweetie...this is sone of my favorites of your...damn I love your wit. You should be a writer for television. I swear...youshould.

thank sfor the laugh honey I needed it on such a ahard day.

I want to give yo a hug.
later honey xxx

Susan at Stony River said...

OMG LOL I'm applauding, this is too good! My favourite one this week, definitely--the photos really sent it home. Thank you for the laugh!

Jen said...

Haven't heard of that before but what a great idea. Nice job. Thanks for stopping by my site and visiting. Do come back again and take part in the fun.

Empress Bee (of the High Sea) said...

yeah, why??? ha ha ha

smiles, bee
xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Travis said...

HA! I needed that little giggle this evening.

Linda said...

You are such a clever lady - and to do it all in 55 words, too! Amazing!

Cloudia said...

come on Ake-
Let's do the

T W I S T!


;-]

Aloha
Comfort Spiral

Shrinky said...

Hahahaha, love it - very witty!

MarmiteToasty said...

LOL you got me once again :)

x

Mama Zen said...

That's hilarious!

Jeff B said...

Bwahahahaha

Connie said...

ha, good one.

Akelamalu said...

Ah tricked you Thom :)

Got you too eh Quilly ?

Thanks Laney. x

No definitely not Flowerpot :)

Why thankyou Deb :)

Haha got you too eh Dumdad :)

You're so right Buff!

Quite Snowelf :)

Glad you enjoyed it Dulce :)

A giggle is good Daryl x

You're too kind Ron but thanks m'dear. x

Cheers Mrs. N :)

Yes it was Anthony :)

You're in good company G-man I'm no techie either! :)

I'm so please my post cheered you Indigo and welcome, nice to meet you. :)

I'm pleased you were surprised Fandango

How kind you are Dr. John, thankyou. x

Now there's a thought Mona! Thanks honey. x

Cheers Cat!

LOL no cell phone would be a tribal emergency here San! :)

I'm happy to make you smile Dianne x

Aw Spiky I love it when you like my writing. x

So pleased you enjoyed it Susan, thanks m'deario. x

You should try 55 fiction Jen it's easier than it looks honestly. :)

Quite Bee! LOL

Glad you got a giggle out of it Trav x

Thanks Linda x

Hehe Cloudia, you like the twist don't you?

Cheers Shrinky x

I do my best Marmie LOL

Thanks Mama Zen :)

It tickled you too eh Jeff?

Akelamalu said...

Thanks Connie :)

Maggie May said...

Very good!
Wasn't expecting that!

bindhiya said...

LOL! great #55 as always.
♥ & ((hugs))
bindi

Akelamalu said...

Cheers Maggie :)

Thankyou Bindi x

cathy said...

I just have to say this...

You can't beat a mobile phone :)

Mimi Lenox said...

Oh my. That was classic Akelamalu....

Gloria said...

Brilliant . . Again. I was, and am, totally hooked.

This is my first visit and I know I'm going to return again and again. So entertaining!!

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