Microfiction Monday #43

Susan at Stony River hosts this fun theme each Monday, so do pop over and read the others who have signed Mr. Linky. The rules are thus:



Every Monday Susan will post a picture for the subject of your story. Microfiction means the shortest of short stories. Think Aesop's fables, comic strips, or even jokes: complete stories that can be told in under a minute. For this game, the limit is a tweetable 140 characters or fewer, including spaces and punctuation.


Here's today's picture and my contribution

Margaret had been praying for days and now the fairy was here to grant her wish.

Silently fairy dropped the odour eater into Ebenezer’s shoe.


140 characters including spaces and punctuation

Friday 55 Flash Fiction #153 Cool Water.....

The water was cool and pleasant.

Sunlight dancing on the surface.

People sitting on the bank, lazily reading, eating and drinking.

What's that dangling in the water?

He made a grab for it,

only to be hauled out of the water

into a keep net, with a hook in his mouth!

Who'd be a fish?

Friday 55 Flash Fiction is brought to you by G-man (Mr Knowitall). The idea is you write a story in exactly 55 words. If you want to take part pop over and let G-man know when you've posted your 55.

I'm a very lucky gal..........

If you click on the photo it should biggify.

See these beautiful earrings?     The wonderful, talented Bee (Empress Bee of the High Seas) made those just for me!  How lucky am I?     The photograph doesn't really do them justice as the turquoise is a lot more vibrant in real life.  If you would like to see some more examples of Bee's handiwork take a look here.   Aren't they just beautiful?


Bee makes jewellery as a hobby, lots of people tell her she should open an etsy shop to sell them but she prefers to gift them to people.  How kind is she?


Anyway I just wanted to show you my gift and say a very public thankyou to Bee - you're a wonderful lady my friend and I love you.

Microfiction Monday #42

Susan at Stony River hosts this fun theme each Monday, so do pop over and read the others who have signed Mr. Linky. The rules are thus:



Every Monday Susan will post a picture for the subject of your story. Microfiction means the shortest of short stories. Think Aesop's fables, comic strips, or even jokes: complete stories that can be told in under a minute. For this game, the limit is a tweetable 140 characters or fewer, including spaces and punctuation.

Here's today's picture and my contribution, though somehow I have managed to pick up a completely different picture prompt to everyone else.   Don't ask me how, I have no idea!

Hey Godzilla, don’t look now but here comes Rodan for your date.

Damn he’s early, I haven’t had time to brush my teeth, does my breath smell?


140 characters including spaces and punctuation

Friday 55 Flash Fiction #152 Old Friends.......

Carol watched the door waiting for Beverley's arrival.

She'd noticed the woman by the window, strange looking she thought.

Thirty minutes later Carol pulled on her coat and headed for the door.

"Hello Carol" said the woman by the window.

"Bev?   I didn't recognise you!"

"I had plastic surgery, what do you think?" asked Bev.

Friday 55 Flash Fiction is brought to you by G-man (Mr Knowitall). The idea is you write a story in exactly 55 words. If you want to take part pop over and let G-man know when you've posted your 55.

Personal Ads......

APPARENTLY THIS IS AN ACTUAL PERSONAL AD FROM THE "SAVANNAH TRIBUNE" NEWSPAPER PLACED IN DECEMBER 2009........ EVEN IF IT'S NOT TRUE IT'S STILL FUNNY.




To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me In Downtown Savannah night before last.



Date: 2009-05-27, 1 :43 a.m E.S.T.



I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you demanded that I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend, threatening our lives. You also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings. I can only hope that you somehow come across this rather important message.


First, I'd like to apologize for your embarrassment; I didn't expect you to actually crap in your pants when I drew my pistol after you took my jacket.. The evening was not that cold, and I was wearing the jacket for a reason.. My girlfriend hadjust bought me that Kimber Model 1911 .45 ACP pistol for my birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster for it that very evening.

Obviously you agree that it is a very intimidating weapon when pointed at your head ... isn't it?!


I know it probably wasn't fun walking back to wherever you'd come from with that brown sludge in your pants.

I'm sure it was even worse walking bare-footed since I made you leave your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me. [That prevented you from calling or running to your buddies to come help mug us again].

After I called your mother or "Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, I explained the entire episode of what you'd done. Then I went and filled up my gas tank as well as those of four other people in the gas station, -- on your credit card. The guy with the big motor home took 150 gallons and was extremely grateful!

I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go's, along with all the cash in your wallet. [That made his day!]

I then threw your wallet into the big pink "pimp mobile" that was parked at the curb ... after I broke the windshield and side window and keyed the entire driver's side of the car.


Later, I called a bunch of phone sex numbers from your cell phone. Ma Bell just now shut down the line, although I only used the phone for a little over a day now, so what 's going on with that? Earlier, I managed to get in two threatening phone calls to the DA's office and one to the FBI, while mentioning President Obama as my possible target.

The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a nice long chat (I guess while he traced your number etc.).  In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you . but I feel this type of retribution is a far more appropriate punishment for your threatened crime.. I wish you well as you try to sort through some of these rather immediate pressing issues, and can only hope that you have the opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps reconsider, the career path you've chosen to pursue in life. Remember, next time you might not be so lucky.

Have a good day!
Thoughtfully yours,
Alex

Microfiction Monday #41

Susan at Stony River hosts this fun theme each Monday, so do pop over and read the others who have signed Mr. Linky. The rules are thus:


Every Monday Susan will post a picture for the subject of your story. Microfiction means the shortest of short stories. Think Aesop's fables, comic strips, or even jokes: complete stories that can be told in under a minute. For this game, the limit is a tweetable 140 characters or fewer, including spaces and punctuation.
Here's today's picture and my contribution.

Sophie, my darling, as much as I’d like to stay I really must go back with Edward,

he’s feeling a total gooseberry over there all on his own.

140 characters including punctuation and spaces

Friday 55 Flash Fiction # 151 Hot & Steamy & Where the heck did four years go???

Four years ago today I started this blog, here's how and why it started........

This is my very first entry on my blog. What to write? Hmmmm.......

My blogname 'Akelamalu' is my Hawaian name. No, I'm not Hawaian I got the name from this link
www.blogthings.com/hawaiannamegenerator/
I thought it was cool so used it as I couldn't think of a name myself.


I thought I'd start this blog to keep track of my progress as I'm about to have knee replacement surgery in the very near future. Yes I'm scared but I really have so much trouble walking these days that not having the surgery is not an option. I have a date for my op - 26th February 2007....

Since then I have clocked up 840 posts including this one and my new knee has gone from strength to strength.      I've got over 200 followers, some readers have been with me since almost day one, some have been and gone, and new ones are arriving all the time and I have thoroughly enjoyed getting to know every single one.

Anyway, I'm not sure how long I will carry on but certainly as long as I'm still enjoying myself, so Happy Blogversary to me.



If you've stopped by for my Flash Fiction here it is.

Whew, it's damned hot in here.

It's too full, we're crammed in like sardines.

Can't see a thing through all this steam!

Should that water be cooling us down?

We must be mugs putting ourselves through this

and we'll do it all again tomorrow!

The buzzer sounded.

"It's finished" Gavin shouted "I'll empty the dishwater."


Friday 55 Flash Fiction is brought to you by G-man (Mr Knowitall). The idea is you write a story in exactly 55 words. If you want to take part pop over and let G-man know when you've posted your 55.

Message in the sky....

Received the following in an email.   I don't know if it's true but I hope so.

This is the final flypast of RAF Harriers over No 10 Downing Street before they headed for the knackers yard.






You may have to tilt your head a bit or even screw your eyes up to read the message!

Microfiction Monday #40

Susan at Stony River hosts this fun theme each Monday, so do pop over and read the others who have signed Mr. Linky. The rules are thus:


Every Monday Susan will post a picture for the subject of your story. Microfiction means the shortest of short stories. Think Aesop's fables, comic strips, or even jokes: complete stories that can be told in under a minute. For this game, the limit is a tweetable 140 characters or fewer, including spaces and punctuation.


Here's today's picture and my contribution.

Only slightly late, Kate was disappointed her blind date hadn’t waited,

Had she arrived earlier she would have seen the police arresting him.

140 characters including punctuation and spaces

Friday 55 Flash Fiction # 150 Message from Space....

Listening to the broadcast, the scientists deliberated over where it had originated.

What galaxy had life forms capable of sending a message into space.

They were the only ones who were evolved enough.

These were strange sounds, hopefully they would be able to make sense of the garbled message....

Across The Universe by The Beatles!

Friday 55 Flash Fiction is brought to you by G-man (Mr Knowitall). The idea is you write a story in exactly 55 words. If you want to take part pop over and let G-man know when you've posted your 55.

Weekend Break, Day Three.....

We had a later start on our third day of the trip as our first port of call was only 20 minutes away from the hotel.  After breakfast we boarded the coach for the 20 minute journey through the beautiful Surrey countryside to Denbies Wine Estate.  There was a low bridge at the entrance to the estate which barred the coach  from going further but there was a nice man in a Landrover pulling a little train of carriages waiting to take us to the main building where we would start our tour.    Apparently, in summer, the landrover train tours the actual vineyards, which must be a glorious sight however, as it was winter all the vines appeared to be nothing but sticks! 

Denbies Vineyard is, however, an all-weathere destination the "Indoor Wine Experience" tours operate all year round. Denbies produce around 400,000 bottles of fine wine a year and is the largest vineyard in England with 26 acres under vine.  The main distributors of Denbies Wines are Waitrose (South East), smaller independent specialist food shops, farm shops and independent wine merchants and of course the vineyard shop.

After watching short film about the beginnings and workings of the estate we then boarded an small train which took us on a tour of the wine making process.    We were able to take a few pictures as we listened to the running commentary about the various processes.

Fermentation tanks

Oak barrels for maturing the wine

The bottled wine.  Each cage holds 400 bottles.  

Decorative Oak barrels carved by a Belgian from Oak trees that were blown down in the great storm.

Unfortunately they cannot be used for maturing the wine because the wood itself has not been seasoned properly.   However they are very beautiful.

The very knowledgeable lady who explained all about the processes and different wines whilst allowing us to taste them.    We even got to keep the monogrammed tasting glass.

After the very enjoyable tasting we were taken up to the restaurant where a lovely lunch was waiting for us after which we had free time to spend in the shop which sold not only Denbies Wines but all manner of fancy goods too.  Of course we bought two bottles of the wine we enjoyed the most at the tasting to bring home.

After a very enjoyable visit, the nice man with the Landrover train was waiting to take us back to our coach for the next leg of our journey which was to  Wycombe Museum, an 18th century house on a medieval site. Surrounding the museum are Victorian gardens, including a nature trail.

Set in beautiful grounds, and with exciting hands-on activities, Wycombe Museum is a great place to discover the fascinating and varied history of the district and the famous collection of Windsor chairs, which have been manufactured in the area for many years.   Although it is a very small museum (just about enough room for 20 of us) there are a range of galleries to view including the 1920's kitchen, furniture gallery, history rooms as well as the art collection and opportunities to take fun photos.

We spent an enjoyable hour in the museum but it was time to return to the coach for the journey home.   We thoroughly enjoyed our action packed weekend and came home with some lovely memories and momentos.

I hope you enjoyed our weekend away.