Friday, 26 February 2010

Friday 55 Flash Fiction # 108 After Dinner.....



After dinner, back at his apartment,


 
her hand caressed it's hardness.


 
It was smooth, cool to touch, it felt shiny.


 
She would show him what she could do.


 
Manipulating it into the right position, her hand closed round it.


 
Her grip was firm as she gently pulled


 
the gun from her bag and shot him.





BANG!


Friday 55 Flash Fiction is brought to you by G-man (Mr Knowitall). The idea is you write a story in exactly 55 words. If you want to take part pop over and let G-man know when you've posted your 55.
at

64 comments:

  1. Elaine Denning26 February 2010 at 07:54

    LMAO!!!

    Great one, Ak!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anonymous26 February 2010 at 08:04

    Shiny gave it away ;-) LOL Great 55. :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Anonymous26 February 2010 at 08:19

    I was aghast when I started reading this. I thought WTF? OMG This was too good. I should have known. Well done and a great 55. Have a wonderful Friday :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. Flowerpot26 February 2010 at 10:28

    great Ak - how do you do them all?

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hootin Anni26 February 2010 at 10:32

    I was thinking fork all the time!!!-----

    DAMSEL IN DISTRESS 55 for me this week. [scroll down a bit to find 'er]

    ReplyDelete
  6. Dumdad26 February 2010 at 10:43

    Crikey, I thought hot stuff and then the sting in the tail...

    ReplyDelete
  7. Dumdad26 February 2010 at 10:43

    This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Brian Miller26 February 2010 at 10:53

    eep! hope he enjoyed the last meal...fun 55. mine is up...

    ReplyDelete
  9. anthonynorth26 February 2010 at 11:13

    Nice twist at the end :-)

    ReplyDelete
  10. Unknown26 February 2010 at 11:33

    I was thinking it , I was.. lol
    Great one.

    hugs
    shakira

    ReplyDelete
  11. inappropriatesue26 February 2010 at 11:34

    Did you have to make it a gun? It was quite... wait for it...anti-climactic, LOL!!! hehehe Great 55
    I’m up right HERE

    ReplyDelete
  12. mrsnesbitt26 February 2010 at 11:35

    Good one! (AS ever!)

    ReplyDelete
  13. Akelamalu26 February 2010 at 11:59

    Thanks Laney :)

    Glad you liked it Moms Journal :)

    Did I shock you Thom? LOL

    I don't know Flowerpot, they just come to me. :)

    Haha I never thought of that Anni!

    I hope you weren't disappointed Dumdad? (wink)

    So do I Brian!

    I like a twist at the end Anthony :)

    Ah you weren't expecting the gun then Shakira? ;)

    Cheers Realliveman

    It was definitely anticlimatic for him Susan!

    Thankyou Mrs N x

    ReplyDelete
  14. The Silver Fox26 February 2010 at 12:35

    I have several comments, none of them printable! ;-) Great little twist.

    ReplyDelete
  15. the mother of this lot26 February 2010 at 12:52

    Of course, I knew it was a gun all the time!

    Completely off-topic - I have just read Kit's story. I was born in Ancoats,my grandparents are buried in Moston Cemetary, I went to a convent school in Cheetham Hill, so was often in St. Chad's church, and I will be at Mass at St. Pat's on St. Patrick's Day!

    Do you think we are related?!

    ReplyDelete
  16. Peter Stone26 February 2010 at 13:28

    Hmm, I saw the gun before I started reading, so kind a missed the other reaction. Remind me not to invite her to dinner though...

    My 55 is Love returned

    ReplyDelete
  17. Valerie26 February 2010 at 14:43

    Heehee that's the best 55 EVER. Loved it, I really did.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Jessie26 February 2010 at 15:19

    lol
    fabolous!!!!!

    warm, laughing smiles,

    ReplyDelete
  19. Akelamalu26 February 2010 at 15:24

    OH do tell me what you were going to say Silver Fox! :)

    Did you really guess the ending MOTL? I think we could be related LOL. I hope you enjoyed KIT. x

    Oh it's a shame you saw the gun Peter. Thanks for stopping by to read and commenting. :)

    So glad you liked it Val x

    Cheers Jesse :)

    ReplyDelete
  20. Empress Bee (of the high sea)26 February 2010 at 15:53

    ha ha ha ha ha...

    smiles, bee
    xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

    ReplyDelete
  21. Ed & Jeanne26 February 2010 at 16:14

    And women wonder why we don't understand them... ;)

    Nice ending!

    Here's my 55 here

    ReplyDelete
  22. quilly26 February 2010 at 16:15

    My mind was on a completely different tack until you got to "shiny" and then I was WTF? Great ending.

    ReplyDelete
  23. The Silver Fox26 February 2010 at 16:32

    @Akelamalu: Okay, you asked for it. Here are the "cleanest" two.

    1. Several commenters we're thinking "it" was one thing, until the word "shiny" was used, which confused them. Well, almost anything can look shiny, if it gets wet... somehow...

    2. In stories that begin this way, it's usually not the woman who "shoots" at the end...

    ReplyDelete
  24. secret agent woman26 February 2010 at 16:37

    This is probably the first of these I've guessed from the first sentence, without the picture.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Ron26 February 2010 at 16:43

    OMG...this was HYSTERICAL!!!!!!

    You had me going all the way until I got to the end!

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

    BRAVA, m'dear!

    FLAWLESS!

    Have a wonderful weekend!

    X

    ReplyDelete
  26. Akelamalu26 February 2010 at 16:47

    You liked it Bee! :)

    How can you NOT understand women VE? LOL BTW welcome and thanks for commenting. :)

    Ah I wonder what you were thinking Quilly? ;)

    I made the mistake of reading your no2 comment with a mouthful of tea Silver Fox - now you can imagine what's wet!

    You must be psychic SAW!

    ReplyDelete
  27. Akelamalu26 February 2010 at 16:48

    Crikey Ron you slipped in there whilst I was replying to comments! So glad you liked it hon and I'm glad it kept you guessing. x

    ReplyDelete
  28. Mona26 February 2010 at 16:50

    LOL @ Silver fox!

    That was a very naughty55ve!

    ReplyDelete
  29. Smalltown RN26 February 2010 at 17:15

    OH my....a tad steamy with a twist!

    ReplyDelete
  30. Akannie26 February 2010 at 18:48

    LOL..

    It must have been a horrid meal.

    Great 55 and I'm glad I've found you!!

    ReplyDelete
  31. Linda26 February 2010 at 19:02

    Ok, so I'm thinking she's grabbing the handle of a cast iron skillet to whump him upside the head with but oh no, you go me one better and give her a gun! You are SO good at this!

    ReplyDelete
  32. Butt Nekkid Bath Boutique26 February 2010 at 19:08

    LMAO! That was good! Had me all the way to the end. What a twist!

    ~ Mzz Thang
    www.Fo-Shizzle.com

    ReplyDelete
  33. Nessa26 February 2010 at 19:28

    You are such a tease.

    ; )

    One Single Impression - Insomnia

    ReplyDelete
  34. buffalodick26 February 2010 at 19:41

    That's what my wife would do if I suggested what you implied was going on! :) Good One!

    ReplyDelete
  35. Unknown26 February 2010 at 21:13

    I read your words and started to think that you have changed your site to an adult orientated site. My eyes darted from word to word and the anticipation of a sensual story started to play with my inner senses. It was the last line that did me in. The last laugh was on me.

    That was my 55.
    Thanks that was fun.

    ReplyDelete
  36. Buzzard26 February 2010 at 22:36

    She did what? With what? LOL

    Mine's Up: The Loft

    ReplyDelete
  37. Anonymous26 February 2010 at 23:49

    Shiny, eh? I always preferred the matte black finish, personally.

    Nicely done.

    Mine is here.

    ReplyDelete
  38. Cloudia27 February 2010 at 01:24

    You GoT me!


    Aloha, Pearly Sistah


    Comfort Spiral

    ReplyDelete
  39. g-man27 February 2010 at 01:27

    Ake...?
    You evil little thing you!
    I Loved This 55!
    Absolutly thru and thru...YOU!
    Thank you so much for your daily brilliance...You Rock!
    Have a Kick Ass Week-End...Galen

    ReplyDelete
  40. Akelamalu27 February 2010 at 09:56

    It was naughty wasn't it Mona LOL

    Yes it was RN :)

    Probably Akanni. I'm glad you found me too. :)

    She wanted something a bit more deadly than a skillet Linda ;)

    Welcome Foshizzle, I'm glad you enjoyed it. :)

    I try Nessa :)

    Hehe whatever do you mean Buff? ;)


    Sorry if I shocked you for a minute or two Dave LOL


    Glad you liked it Buzzard and welcome to my home from home.


    Are we talking guns here Titanium? ;)


    Haha, you and a few others I think Cloudia!


    Me, Evil? What do you mean G-man? LOL

    ReplyDelete
  41. The Silver Fox27 February 2010 at 10:01

    "I made the mistake of reading your no2 comment with a mouthful of tea Silver Fox - now you can imagine what's wet!"

    Yes, I can... but please tell me anyway. ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  42. Akelamalu27 February 2010 at 10:07

    PS Fo-shizzle for some reason I cannot comment on your blog sorry.

    ReplyDelete
  43. Akelamalu27 February 2010 at 10:17

    Why Silver Fox my keyboard of course! ;)

    ReplyDelete
  44. The Silver Fox27 February 2010 at 10:19

    Oh. That would've been my second guess.

    ReplyDelete
  45. Akelamalu27 February 2010 at 10:51

    And your first guess was what Silver Fox?

    ReplyDelete
  46. The Silver Fox27 February 2010 at 11:19

    Why, your computer monitor, of course!

    What were you thinking? ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  47. Akelamalu27 February 2010 at 11:25

    I'm really not sure Silver Fox because I don't know you well enough yet. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  48. The Silver Fox27 February 2010 at 11:33

    Irish-English-Lithuanian Scorpio, notorious flirt... What else do you need to know?

    ReplyDelete
  49. Akelamalu27 February 2010 at 11:45

    Well that's enough to be going on with. Fellow Scorpios are always good fun I find. I'm sure we'll get to know each other better the more we read each other's blogs. :)

    ReplyDelete
  50. maryt/theteach27 February 2010 at 15:35

    Thanks, Akalamalu, great reading! :)

    ReplyDelete
  51. Travis Cody27 February 2010 at 21:23

    Well!

    ReplyDelete
  52. Maggie May27 February 2010 at 21:55

    What a charming young lady. Wondered what she was holding.

    Nuts in May

    ReplyDelete
  53. hope27 February 2010 at 23:15

    Remind me never to make you angry. :)

    Have a good weekend!

    ReplyDelete
  54. Susan at Stony River28 February 2010 at 00:28

    LOL My kind of girl!!

    ReplyDelete
  55. happily retired gal28 February 2010 at 02:01

    Oh my! That one took me by surprise for sure.
    Hugs and blessings,

    ReplyDelete
  56. Mimi Lenox28 February 2010 at 02:55

    I thought I knew you and your Flash Fiction! You got me again!!!

    I'm reading along thinking...."what turn is she gonna take?" ..."where is going with this?"...."I'll bet she's going to stick to the erotic trail just to throw us off the obvious trail if you know what I mean"...and then wham! You did it again.

    I bow to your awesomeness.

    ReplyDelete
  57. Anonymous28 February 2010 at 07:30

    I started reading and had to look around the office to see who was around... then she just shot him. Phew!

    ReplyDelete
  58. cheshire wife28 February 2010 at 11:24

    No messing about then!

    ReplyDelete
  59. Finding Pam28 February 2010 at 13:28

    Sexy and brilliant...and a bit naughty!

    ReplyDelete
  60. Akelamalu28 February 2010 at 14:46

    My pleasure Teach :)

    Indeed Trav ;)

    I'm not sure 'charming' describes her well Maggie LOL

    LOL it's not me Hope :0

    I thought you'd like it Susan :)

    Aha, gotcha Happily Retired Gal!

    Thankyou Mimi,coming from a great writer such as yourself that is indeed a compliment. x

    Were you blushing Eternally Distracted? LOL

    No Cheshire Wife she was thoroughly p****d at him! LOL


    Cheers Pam :)

    ReplyDelete
  61. tony28 February 2010 at 15:14

    Aw Shucks! It Started Off So Romantic !

    ReplyDelete
  62. Akelamalu28 February 2010 at 18:21

    LOL indeedy Tony :)

    ReplyDelete
  63. TBM1 March 2010 at 20:46

    HA! Totally LOL.

    ReplyDelete
  64. Akelamalu6 March 2010 at 11:13

    Glad you liked it JAPRA

    ReplyDelete

Hello little butterfly, what do you want to say?